Dedicated

We dedicated our girls to the Lord this weekend. Instead of baptizing our children, we choose to dedicate them. It's more for the parents than for the kids, because we understand that it is our responsibility and duty to do our very best to raise them to be believers in Jesus Christ. Making a public commitment can be useful in holding us accountable. If you are interested in more, here is a good article that explains the why's and when's and other FAQs. 

We hadn't dedicated Josie yet because we had been looking for a new church when she was a baby. Once we knew we were having another baby, it seemed easier to just wait and do them together. It was fun to have them share something like this. 

We picked Deuteronomy 6:5-7 as our verses for our girls.

5 You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might. 6 And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart. 7 You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise.

We invited our family to join us in church and then spent some time at our house afterwards to enjoy the beautiful day and each other's company. It was a great day! I'll let the pictures say the rest.

Some of our friends in our small group (Missional Community) came up to pray around us. It was so touching to feel their support and love.

Hubby changed clothes before we could get family pictures... good thing he kept it classy with his business's t-shirt.

So forced.

Much better.

The best we could get.

She wanted to hold both of her grandma's hands.

My nephew. He's a heart breaker already.

Someone (ahem) was done with pictures by this point.

Dean looks so much like his uncle did when he was a baby.

Playing with grandpa's glasses.

This girl is too smart. She lined up all of her farm animals around the ball of "food".

This girl is growing up too fast.

Such a mover, but even her profile makes me smile.

 

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What a Week

But seriously, it's been crazy around here! Bullet points seem appropriate.

• We no longer have a foster child. It was supposed to be short-term (we found out the day of that he was leaving in the early afternoon) so we weren't taken by surprise. We have mixed feelings about it. On one hand, we don't feel like we really got a taste for what foster care is like since the first week is usually full of the unknowns like getting to know the child (who comes in as a total stranger with his/her own habits, character traits, and quirks). On the other hand, sometimes you just know if a child clicks with you right off the bat. It doesn't take longer than a few hours to figure that out. As always, the future is unclear. 
• Josie recovered for a total of two days before coming down with another cold. I swear I could fill a gallon milk jug with what comes out of her nose throughout the day. It is so gross and I feel terrible for her. On top of that, she has a wheezy, constant cough and is just tuckered out most of the time. 
• Tomorrow, we are getting the girls dedicated at church so I've been slowly prepping for the meal we will serve afterwards. We aren't making a huge production of it so I haven't been going overboard with planning. I'm just excited to spend some time with my family.
• Having three kids really showed me a lot. I forget sometimes that as kids age, they also mature. A five year old is much more helpful than an almost two year old so there were many times that things actually went smoother and faster. I had another person to help corral Josie so I had a little more flexibility going places that didn't include carts or strollers. Of course, there was also more whining, questions (oh, the questions), and the "I'm bored"s than we were used to. One thing I do know for sure is that I am not afraid of having more kids. I hear all the time that the jump from two to three is crazy and overwhelming (and of course usually its with a newborn that is needy and helpless) but I think I just need to remember that I am quite the "go with the flow" parent and so is hubby. Being a circus show doesn't really scare us much. We usually look for the humor and try to enjoy the crazy moments.
•  The weather is finally nice. Today, we are enjoying 65 degrees with a light wind and blue sky. I have pretty much forgotten what that is like! Audrey isn't a fan of the sun in her eyes (although she is usually laying down so it is really in her eyes) but other than that, we are all enjoying the freedom of coatless adventures outside. 
• With the upcoming summer season comes the dreadful closet stare down. I have been pregnant for the last two summers, so there isn't much there for options. Today, I tucked my pride in the trash can as I walked out of Walmart (yes, Walmart) with two bags of summer clothes. I want comfy, cheap, light clothes and they surprised me yet again with their selection. First perfect skinny jeans, now perfect summer dresses, shorts, and tops? Nice.
• I love having the windows open.  This post is all over the place. That is all.

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A little Update

It's been quiet over here on this little blog. Having three kids in our house  has created a lot of chaos and adjustment and we are definitely being stretched in more ways than we are used to. 

Hubby heard someone describe it, "Our parenting has gone from one on one to zone defense" and that is exactly what it feels like! Having three kids around is definitely busier. It helps, though, that the newest child is also the oldest because he has been much more reliable than a newborn would be. He is able to do a lot of things on his own when I am too busy to help him with something (put his shoes on, eat his food, use the bathroom, etc) and while he has his needs that are different than the girls' needs, we are figuring it out. 

I'm finding myself unable to put into words what I would like to express here because of the privacy concerns with foster kids. It will be an adjustment for me as I'm used to sharing anything I feel like. It's hard for me to separate experiences with my kids (that I can share) and the experiences that include our foster child. Bear with me, I'll hopefully figure it out more and more as time goes on.

One thing I do know for sure, though, is that being busy like this is not such a bad thing. Yes, I'm completely exhausted by the end of the day (who am I kidding, by midday most days) but I have purpose and I know that I am following God's will, which is really what is important. I have no idea what the future holds for us with foster care (sound like a broken record yet?) but for now, I'm thankful to have heard His calling and for answering it.



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Audrey Joy, Five Months Old

Audrey turned five months old on April 18th. This month has been so much better for this little babe. Around the time of the four month update, she was continually fussing and just didn't seem to be her happy self. We tried adjusting all kinds of things, but I think that ultimately she was just going through the huge growth spurt that happens around that time. Once we got past that (along with a few other adjustments), she is doing great and we haven't looked back.

After this post about my struggles with breast feeding, I ended up pumping for the whole month while supplementing her with formula. She would not latch on once she knew that the bottle was an option, which was frustrating to say the least. I did my best to keep my supply up, but of course it eventually slowed down and I threw in the towel this week after only pumping 1 1/2 oz for an entire day. That tiny amount was not worth how much time it was taking, so even though I wanted to continue until she was six months old, I was ready to be done. I am praying that she doesn't get too sick in the next month without my immunity being passed to her. That really is the reason that I had wanted to continue until at least six months. At least after that point, I can give her some medicine for fevers or teething. 

With her now drinking formula, she has really chunked up! I don't know how much she weighs, but she is definitely quite a bit bigger than she was last month. Even within the first week of formula supplementing, her face changed a lot and she started filling out her clothes. I put away all of her 0-3 month clothing and have even noticed that some of Josie's hand-me-downs are too small even though they are 3-6 month. What a change! Those chubby cheeks are too much for me. I just can't get enough of them.

This month, she spent a large amount of play time on her tummy and she's starting to grab for toys intentionally. She's finding her feet and understanding that her hands belong to her. It's so fun to watch her pick something up, hold it in front of her, and then either throw it down or bring it closer (usually to her mouth). Her wonder and excitement is contagious. I've been working with her sitting up, and I can see that she is getting stronger although she isn't really that close yet. I'm in no hurry for her to grow up as fast as her sister did... she can take her time with this!

Sleeping has improved this month. She had been waking up 3-4 times a night because she was hungry, but once we started filling her up as much as we could before bed, she slept longer only waking once (sometimes twice) a night. The problem we had this month was that when she did get up that one time, it took up to two hours to get her back to sleep. We were practically pulling our hair out trying to figure out why she wouldn't go back to sleep. She has grown out of this too (thank you God) and is now getting up once (occasionally twice) to eat but falling back asleep almost immediately. It's such a relief. Now that I am not breast feeding, we are doing what we did with Josie for night duty. Every other night, either hubby or I (just one of us) get up with both girls no matter what. That way, the night that we have "off" is quality sleep instead of just waiting for the next crying girl. It makes a huge difference to know that if someone needs something, it's taken care of. I know we both sleep better with this arrangement. Of course, the nights when it is our turn, we are both less than thrilled about it. It's fair, though, so it keeps us from the unnecessary middle of the night bickering. (Let's face it, neither of us are at our bests then.)

I can count on smiles from this girl all the time. She's much more content playing on the floor or in her ExerSaucer. We also got out our Johnny Jumper and she enjoys that just as much. The only problem is that her sister loves to spin her around and push her like it's a swing. Because of this, not much time is spent in it since it has to hang in the bedroom door which isn't close to anything. I can't trust Josie for one second when she's in there! 

We haven't started solids yet, although I have tried baby oatmeal with her a few times. She still isn't showing much interest in food, and I'm not too concerned with it. She'll be ready when she's ready and she's growing just fine. It's a lot more work for me, too, so when she's ready, we'll do it but for now, it's fine to just try it out here and there.

Audrey is not a fan of the car seat. Although she eventually does stop fussing, I spend a lot of every drive with my arm reaching back awkwardly trying to hold the pacifier in her mouth. Its the only thing that works to keep her from fussing (which leads to screaming). Once the weather is nice enough to take off the car seat cover, I'm hoping she'll enjoy being able to see everything and won't be angry about all things car seat all the time. Other than that, she is rarely fussy unless she's tired or hungry and then who can blame her? She's gotten a lot tougher with Josie's big sister roughness and only cries from it really is too rough. A baby can only take so much rough housing!

I just really really really love this age. She's not independent enough to be into everything but she loves to play, is starting to show personality, and is content almost all the time. So much fun. I believe that is what I thought when Josie hit this age too.

Here is a comparison of the girls. Audrey on the left, Josie on the right.

Click here to see how she's changed each month.

 

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Josie says

Oh boy. 

Josie went up to him* and leaned in to give him a kiss. While she leaned back she said "Lufs soo too" with a huge smile on her face. Thankfully, her aim is less than accurate and the "kiss" landed more in the air to the right than on his face. 

He just looked at her like...what are you doing? I'm glad he doesn't appreciate that kind of attention quite yet because this mama isn't ready for that!



*him-our foster son who's name need not be mentioned





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The first

We have a foster child living with us! It was last minute (which wasn't surprising) and has gone extremely well all things considered. He's a he and is five years old and has been great with the girls. Josie is already smitten. She follows him around and loves that he will let her play with him. She echoes him and grins at me from across the room. It's so sweet. Thankfully, he enjoys her company and is willing to put up with her selfish toddler ways.

It's a huge adjustment, but not in the way I expected. I have no idea how to entertain a five year old and a boy for that matter. We have a bunch of girl toys but they are much more appropriate for girls and kids two and under. I don't know what is normal when it comes to things like bathing, using the bathroom, changing clothes, etc. I'm so thankful to have a husband to help me out of those awkward situations.

Another difference is that sometimes there is more "down time" for me because the kids can actually play together. On the other hand, five year olds talk a lot more. I swear my ears are ringing. I've answered more questions today than I have ever answered before. Seriously. The kid's curious. 

I'm so glad to be doing this. I know this is the honeymoon stage, and that we have no answers to our many (many!) questions, but today, this first full day as a family of five (temporary as it is) was a good day. A day that I am truly thankful for.



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Josie says with a little bit of Josie does

Today my 21 month old decided that she was too big for plain cheerios. She took it upon herself to add her milk to the cheerios that were no longer in her bowl but were instead in her kitchen pot, the perfect size for a toddler's breakfast. She then proceeded to eat the cereal "like a big girl" and didn't even make a mess. When did she learn to do this? Grammy's. It must be at Grammy's. 

There are still toddler antics involved. She decided to "have tea" with her cereal, and chose to use the teapot's lid as an alternative to her spoon. I'm still impressed.

You will hear her say "hey dad" as casual as a teenager in passing at all times of the day. "Hey mom" is thrown in too, but that one isn't quite as teen-like. I don't know who told her that it was okay to refer to us as "mom and dad". I like the childish "mommy and daddy" but I guess she's too old for that.

Hubby's newest story: At night, right before turning out the lights but after reading a story, he prays a prayer with Josie with his hands folded and eyes closed. He's not delusional - he knows she doesn't have her eyes closed most of the time, but lately she's taken to grabbing him by the beard and pulling his face right up to hers before saying "I'm talkin' to you!" right in the middle of it. Needless to say, he has to hold back his laughter each and every time. And yes, it's happened more than once. 

She's also done this to me, but instead of grabbing my nonexistant beard, she puts both hands on my cheeks and pulls me in close. 

After church on Sunday, we were all piled in the car (including aunt Lara in the middle between the girls), and suddenly Josie started to softly sing the ABCs. She got all the way to LMNOP perfectly and then continued to loop that part over and over. We just looked at each other surprised - who knew she knew that much of it? She said each letter clear as day. She also knows the ending - "now I know my ABCs..." so we just have one small part left to learn.

She's full of surprises.




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Buttons, new looks, weekend updates, and more

I did it. I made a blog button (such a huge deal, I know). I was bound and determined to figure out how to do it, and it only took me a few hours. Does that show you how techy I am (not)? Regardless, it's on the side of my blog and you are welcome to grab it if you would like. 

I'd absolutely love to do a button trade, so if you are interested in that, let me know please! I also have my blog list on the right side, and would love to add more to it but don't always remember to update it. Let me know if you'd like to be on that too. :) I'm always up for helping out other bloggers (even though my little blog is just that - little).

And also - did you see my new blog look? If you are reading from a reader or through your email you'll have to go to my actual blog page ... I think it's worth it though. I like it. It's nothing fancy but it fits me and isn't as wintery/dark as the last one.

We had a great weekend. We finished up the training for foster care and had dinner with friends on Saturday night. Sunday was great. After church, my sister took Josie to the circus and my parents came up to hang out with Audrey. That left hubby and I to have some free time and we spent it doing the most romantic thing we could think of... shopping! We hit up a few places we had been meaning to go and got back to the house just in time to scarf down some Italian food before my sister and parents hit the road to drive back in blizzard-like conditions(isn't it mid April?). We spent the evening playing with play dough and making rice krispie bars. It was a great day, definitely one for the books.

After church but before we went on our "date," we did a 20 minute clean up where we both just ran around putting away the random things that were homeless and cleaning random floors, toilets, and rooms. I love those short little cleaning spurts when we both motivated at the same time. It felt so good to see the weird little things get done and the house just looked more put together afterwards. I was beaming all afternoon just from that 20 minute session. It's the little things, right?

They stayed for the whole first half (pretty good for a 22 month old) and apparently she hated cotton candy but loved the pickle on a stick. I'm not even a little surprised by this.

Audrey decided to redeem herself from the previous time we were with Grammy and Bappa where she screamed almost the whole weekend prior to her magical chiropractor visit. This time around, she cooed, smiled and giggled for them for most of the afternoon, officially wrapping them around her little finger.

Twas a good weekend.

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The Next Step

We've had a lot of major changes in the last year. I got pregnant with our second child, quit my job, started a piano studio, had a baby, said good bye to our dear Buckley, and grew our (my hubby's) business to be just about twice as busy. With all of that, we still felt a calling from God to add one more major change. We just finished the steps required and are now licensed to do foster care. 

It's something that has been on my heart for a while. I have acquaintances that have recently had foster children, I have come across (purely by accident) a few blogs that were either starting the journey or right in the midst of it. I heard about it more and more through social media and the news. Really, it was right in my face. I felt the familiar nudge of God pointing me towards something, but fear kept me from going after it aggressively for a relatively long time. My biggest fear was bringing this up to my hubby. He loves our kids but isn't what he would refer to as a "kid person." He's never been drawn to other people's kids and didn't feel like he would be good at it. I've learned since we started this process that it is very common for men to feel this way, and that gave me more confidence to continue looking into it.

The process is not simple, although it's not too crazy either. We had to do background checks, get our fingerprints taken, do a home study to make sure we have a safe house, have three references, get interviewed multiple times by a social worker, and then take 24 hours of educational classes. The classes were the most time consuming and took place over three Saturdays. I'm thankful for them, though, because they answered a lot of our questions and addressed a lot of our fears, some that we didn't even know we had. 

Although I did not mention it publicly via Facebook or this blog, we have been talking about it with different people in our lives. It's interesting to see the different responses, most  filled with caution. People have heard horror stories and are quick to pass them on to us to "rescue us" from a bad decision. Others are concerned that we will neglect our children or have our marriage disintegrate. While frustrating to hear, they are valid concerns because these things do happen. I'm most thankful for those in our lives that have been supportive from the very beginning. We have numerous people that have already voiced their willingness to help out when needed and be prayer warriors for us. Occasionally we do hear people say things like "wow that is so great of you!" or "You are amazing for saving those kids!" I promise you, that just makes us feel uncomfortable as we know that we are not any more special than anyone else but are just following what God is calling us to do. Also, from what we have heard, these kids will most likely be huge blessings to us, so "saving them" just doesn't sound right to us. Whew. I'll get off of my soap box now.

Within 24 hours of getting the call that we were officially licensed, we were contacted about a potential child needing a home. I scrambled around the bedroom we have started preparing trying my hardest to get it warm and comfortable for a scared and confused child that would be coming to live with us for a while. There's nothing like last minute news to get this procrastinator moving! I had the entire room cleaned up with the bed made and the drawers empty in about two hours. That particular child did not end up staying with us, but getting the call got me moving to get those loose ends wrapped up. Now at least the room is closer to ready. 

The very beginning of the process: new bedding. I'll post more pictures as the room comes together. It was previously filled with boxes of books, sleeping bags, Christmas decorations, Christmas wrapping paper and supplies, a guest bed, all of my grandmother's paintings, and more (if you can even imagine that being possible). We managed to relocate most of that stuff and the room is cleared out for the most part. Now the problem is that it feels so cold and bare. Definitely a work in progress!

The next day, we got another call. When I talked to my hubby about it, we talked about how ridiculous and sad it is that within such a short period of time, we'd already had two calls. How can there be that many kids that need to get out of a bad situation quickly? We had no idea that it was going to be that quick. The seriousness of what we were doing really hit us then. These kids need a safe home, someone they can trust, someone that can show them Jesus. It's no small thing, and we pray that God is working on our hearts to prepare us for this. (That placement also did not happen. It's a good thing when the placements don't happen because it means that the are either safe at their home (hooray!) or that they have a better home for them already like a relative or someone they know.)

It will be a journey, that's for sure. For privacy reasons, we aren't allowed to share anything about the child or children that we have stay with us. There won't be pictures on here with the child in them and I won't be talking much about him or her. I won't stop blogging of course, but that part of my life will not be public. I'm open to discussing the process of foster parenting. Please let me know if you have any questions! 

We hope you will join our "team" by praying along side us. We're cautiously excited to see what God has in store for us.



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Happy birthday sister! And more

Last night was a rough night. Audrey was up for 2 1/2 hours and we couldn't figure out what to do to get her to sleep. We did the usual, changing the diaper, feeding her, wrapping her, unwrapping her, repeatedly gave her the pacifier. None of it made a difference. She was just unhappy. It dawned on me this morning (post middle of the night haze) that she may be teething and she was uncomfortable. Am I a new mom all over again?? Come on, Sarah, get your head on here. 

I mentioned in this post that I was worried about Josie asking where Buckley is. Thankfully she hasn't really seemed to notice although I wouldn't be surprised if she bring it up later. She's so observant though and I'm sure she's heard us talk about it. Hubby shared with me last night that he had a terrible day yesterday just thinking about what we had to do and trying to discern if it was the right decision. Thankfully by the end of the day we were both feeling better about it. 

It's snowing outside. WHAT IS THAT? It's not just a light snow fall either. It's 'coming down more than usual and not melting away at all. Oh winter, won't you just admit defeat?

I feel like I've been a bit of a debbie downer on here lately. Things have been up and down in our lives and I'm only really sharing the downs, but I promise that we have had plenty of great moments too! 

Today is my sister's birthday. SHE AWESOME. She deserves a great birthday and I can't wait to celebrate with her this weekend.

Holding her god daughter Audrey

We're so desperate to get out of the house today that we are going to the mall to meet up with a friend, walk around, and maybe even play a little (yep, in the dirty germ infested play area. It's going to happen).




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