The longest week (and month)

It's been a long week over here. I keep meaning to sit down and write about it, but the time! It's seems to always run out.

Last Friday, Amelia blessed me with a full night's sleep, not waking to eat until 6:00 AM. I also slept on my stomach. These two random things put together led to a clogged milk duct. I knew it right away and tried to massage it out after feeding her. That morning, we had planned on shopping with my parents and then getting lunch. By the time we had finished that, I was sure I had a fever because of the chills and my lack of appetite. Sure enough, I had a 101.5 temp and felt absolutely miserable. I reached out to other mama's on facebook and got some great feedback. After expressing as much milk as I could, feeding her, and pumping the rest out, I felt slightly better. I used a heating pad when she wasn't eating (although with the constant crying if she was awake, it was hard to get this part done without someone else around to help). I slept as much as I could (minimal during the day, but hard at night). I really wanted to avoid the doctor. We've had a bunch of large hospital bills due to her birth, and it just seemed like a waste of money. 

I'm so glad I didn't go in! The clot managed to clear up, the red skin disappeared within hours, and I felt back to normal by Saturday afternoon. That was an awful 36 hours though. 

Feeling miserable, hoping for a tiny nap before the big kids woke up (which didn't really happen)

In other news...

Amelia's crying escalated to a high (or low?) point this week. I felt like I was losing hearing (and my mind, too) from holding her close while she wailed away. If she wasn't sleeping or eating, she was screaming. I vaguely remember saying that she was a happy baby after my milk came in, but that seemed like years ago. This has definitely been a long month.

After doing everything I could think of on Monday to no avail, I called the chiropractor to get her in. They had an opening for Tuesday, which was much earlier than I was expecting. I jumped on it and got her in at 11:00. She screamed all morning before her appointment, napped a little in the car, woke up somewhat happy (shocking, it was) and then got adjusted. I guess she had a spot that was twisted in her mid-back and neck. He adjusted her ...drum roll please...and she seemed like a completely different baby. Immediately. I had hoped this would happen, but also didn't want my hopes to be too high. In my head, I was prepping myself to have to try other things, but thankfully, this seemed to solve whatever was wrong. 

The rest of the day was like none we've had since she's been with us. She barely fussed at all, slept more than usual, and was cooing and smiling at us all day. The chiropractor pointed out how babies are curled up in the womb so laying on their backs is kind of foreign to them at first. Tummy time is important for more than their neck strength. Their back muscles also need to get used to being straightened. This especially made sense when I thought about Millie's behavior. She slept great if we held her all curled up against us, but the second we put her down it was like we'd just dropped her. She would almost immediately wake up screaming. We never really did tummy time (hello, torture for us all) and she was never happy laying on a blanket or the play mat. Since being adjusted, she will happily lay either way for long stretches. She doesn't mind the swing for a longer period of time, and if I set her down while sleeping, she will stay asleep! Seriously, it's amazing.

We have another appointment today to make sure it "sticks" and then we should be good to go. Yesterday was also a great day, with me getting the house back in order and food prepping while she power napped. My sanity is restored! All the exclamation points over here. I feel like I can breathe again and maybe even be productive. 

Speaking of being productive, I've been making a pretty big effort to eat healthy the last few weeks. As I mentioned in this post, I've been counting macros to keep my eating on track. I've lost about 5 lbs, which is a little slower than I want but still progress. The goal of eating much more protein has kept me from eating junk throughout the day. I have a lot more energy and I'm getting the hang of it for sure. 

Right away, I spent a lot of time tracking my foods, figuring out how each food fit in, trying to find alternatives, etc. Now that it's been a couple of weeks, most of the foods I use on a regular basis are in the tracker, ready to be added. It makes it so much faster. 

My favorite alternatives  by far  are greek yogurt for sour cream (think: ranch dressing veggie dip) or ice cream-like desserts and zucchini noodles in place of pasta. For the dessert, I take 1/2 cup of nonfat vanilla greek yogurt, chopped walnuts, strawberries, and a little hershey's chocolate drizzled over it. So amazing! I usually get just enough protein to complete the day, and I can alter the toppings if I don't have a lot of carbs left. 

For the zucchini noodles, I bought a spiralizer that makes long noodles out of vegetables. After frying them up in a little oil, they have a pretty similar texture and pick up the taste of the toppings. I've never been a fan of zucchini, but I'm a huge fan of these! What a great alternative to high carb pasta.

I'd love to hear other alternatives that you've picked up if you have any to share with me. :)

I also just ordered a fancy schmancy sports bra in a much bigger size (these sisters are much bigger than normal...ah hem) in hopes that there will be adequate support without being too tight or uncomfortable. The last thing I want is another clogged milk duct because my bra is too tight. I also don't want to have to hold them in place while working out. It's a fine line... Now that Millie is generally happier, the idea of working out actually seems possible. Just a few more weeks til I have the all clear from my midwife, and I plan on jumping right in.

As for the rest of us, the girls are doing pretty good. Audrey has been potty training for the last month and has consistently only had one or two accidents a day. I think we've had two days with no accidents. They almost always happen in the morning so I'm thinking we'll have to have some kind of motivation to get her thinking about it right away, maybe a sticker chart or chocolate treat if she makes it through the morning. She does fabulous when we are out and about. Nap times are good, too. I'm so proud of how quickly she's picked this up. She's really proving to be a completely different kid than Josie, in almost all ways. 

Hubby is gearing up for busy season to start. Springtime really brings changes around here. He gets all excited for possibilities for his business, the girls get more energy from the extra sunshine and fresh air, I get a huge attitude adjustment and motivation to actually be productive. It's a good time of year.

They look about the same size, but I assure you that they are not. Cousin Clara has a solid 4 month head start and looks like it! Plus look at that head control and huge smile. Give them a few years, though, and you probably won't be able to tell which is older. 

Grandma Annette with her youngest grandbaby.

Lunch with auntie after a successful Chiro appointment (Millie slept the whole meal!)

My mini me. I really need to do another comparison shot of her vs me and this age.It's still pretty spot on.

Millie is awake. She's not screaming. She's not grimacing. Must be after the magical Chiro appointment! Josie wanted to share her puppy that she just decided to love again. We watched a show about dogs being helpers to people in need, and now she's all about loving her helper dog.

Tummy time, finally. She tolerates it for at least a few minutes now.

And she's spent.

Meanwhile...

I have about a minute and a half before the babe is upset and needs me again.

It's been a harrowing few days. Suddenly (or not so suddenly I suppose) it seems that my happy sleep baby is gone and I'm left with a screamer that only sleeps either all day long or not at all. What has happened?? I have no idea. I've been trying a bunch of things but so far no dice. If it gets really bad, I'll definitely be reaching out for ideas, but I still have a few up my sleeve before I get to that point. 

While my mental state is questionable (screaming will do that to you. Girlfriend is wearing me down.) I have found some great new music to love and obsess over! One of my beloved Avett brothers released a new album with a friend of his covering Elliot Smith songs. Don't know who that is? Me neither, but the music is pretty great. It's made things just an itsy bitsy bit better. Give them a sample listen here.

We'll just be over here doing this all day long... or a variation of this that may include standing, bouncing, walking, or swaying for hours on end. 

The last few weeks

I'm not sure if you can see this little progression of pictures (below), but if you can, laugh with me, will you? My phone put these pictures together and it looks like she's ready to chomp down on something. 

I figured I needed to do a photo dump from my phone. It's been a while and although I post a lot of them on Instagram and Facebook, there are still more that I don't want to get lost or left behind. So let's start with most recently and go back a few weeks, shall we?

On Saturday, good friend Allison and I took my three kids (still can't believe I have three kids and that I'm brave enough to take them out and about on my own!) and her one kid to a Celtic festival in the area. It was free, very crowded, and very well put together. We were impressed! Hubby had to work, so I was just thankful to get out of the house. Thankfully, the girls were so into looking at everything, that they behaved great and got to enjoy some of the kids activities set up around the festival.

  
These castle-building blocks were a huge hit with Josie (and Audrey, but mostly because she follows everything that Josie does). Princesses, castles, and the whole fairy tale land are huge with her and seeing these blocks really got her creativity going. I have a feeling these will be on her birthday list (not until June, but it's a great idea and I don't want to forget).

They decorated crowns, made bracelets, colored pictures, and listened to Celtic music. I am part Scottish/Irish/English, which of course means that they are also, so I was thrilled to share a little of this. We get so much of the German background from hubby's family because there is so much of it in the bloodline compared to my "mutt blood" so it's nice to mix it up. :)

Afterwards, we went to a St. Patty's Day parade. The weather was in the 60's and the kids didn't have to wear coats or hats or scarves or any winter clothes. It felt a little magical. Amelia was in the Moby wrap and slept the entire time. It was very crowded, but not too stressful, and we were able to park close. It really seemed like everything just kept going well. This is why I brave the crazy activities, because the more you do them, the easier they seem. The kids love it when we go do new things and just get out of the house. We are all social people I guess.

On Friday, we went to Scheel's to visit my sister, who is working there right now. We tried on shoes (she works in the kids' shoes department), ate supper, and let them play on the playplace. You have to love a store that has food and entertainment for the kids.

When we first got there, we asked Josie to sit on this statue. She thought that was hilarious that we asked her to do it, and laughed and laughed. When she realized we were serious, she got very serious and shy, so daddy stepped up.

The weather has been so great here (as it is everywhere it seems) and we have been trying to enjoy it as much as we can. Walks with all the kids are different than last year since they don't all fit in the stroller. Josie has to walk alongside me, which means we walk a little slower and can't go as far. Those are negatives, but the positives are that she loves "to exercise" with me and we get to have long conversations where I can actually hear her instead of asking her to speak up from way in the front of the stroller. Now it's just poor Audrey who I can't hear. I don't stand a fighting chance with her since she speaks so softly. She does love getting to sit in the "big kid" seat of the stroller; a perk of not being the baby of the family anymore.

We've had some good times with friends who have gotten to meet Amelia. It's been fun introducing her to everyone, but man she's unpredictable! Sometimes she's happy the whole time, sleeping the whole time, and other times she's angry and crying, not wanting to eat or sleep at all. Thankfully, my friends all understand. We just don't know her all that well yet.

One of the events we went to was at the Plains Art Museum downtown. They gave the kids a little tour and then had an art project for them to do at the end. Again, the kids behaved so well because there was a lot to look at and they were totally in to the project at the end. Amelia slept the entire time (but then screamed half the way home) so I was able to focus on the big kids.

The nice weather makes it so much easier to get out and about! Hopefully we'll be able to even more as it keeps getting nicer and nicer outside.

One month after baby - how I'm doing

I didn't do many posts about how I was doing after I had the older girls, but looking back I wish I would have. There are so many changes happening with the kids, but I also am all over the place and want to note it before I forget it.

This time, recovery was tougher. With all of the blood loss from Amelia's birth, I was weaker and much more tired longer. I distinctly remember bouncing back pretty quickly (within two days) after Audrey was born. I had more energy than I knew what to do with and was in great spirits. This time, my mood was good but my energy level was nonexistent. Walking around the house was enough for me. After about two weeks, I could really feel my energy levels returning to normal. I was napping every day when the girls napped (if the girls napped). Finally, four weeks later, I am at the point where I don't need a nap every day. I don't have any desire to nap, which is how I felt after the older girls were born. I haven't felt like that since before I was pregnant with Amelia. It's so nice to have that time back in the middle of the day. Sure, I spend most of it attending to one of the kids and not necessarily getting much else done, but it's time that I have back. It's valuable.

I started out this pregnancy weighing about ten pounds more and then also gained an additional five to ten pounds. This left me with about fifteen pounds more to lose than last time. Honestly, though, I need to lose a lot more than fifteen pounds. That is the first goal, to get back to my pre pregnancy weight, but after that it's just to keep losing weight and toning up. 

I spent a lot of time while pregnant researching what I could do to accomplish this. What else did I have to do? I've yoyo'd in the past and have actually learned a lot, but now it's time to actually apply it. I've learned what I like and dislike with exercise. Running is a favorite, but I have to be careful to not overdue it since my weight is still high. I do not want another stress fracture. I love kickboxing for cardio and BodyPump for weight lifting. I love pilates so I'm going to try to fit PiYo into my workout routine. 

That's a lot to squeeze in, but it'll keep things interesting and hopefully prevent me from getting bored and conveniently "not having time" for exercise. Finding time for it all is an issue. I was hoping that I would be able to get up in the morning before everyone else, 5:30 or 6:00, and get it in before the day started. So far, that hasn't been possible (I'm not cleared for exercise but I could do pilates or stretches, etc) because a certain baby doesn't sleep awesome from 5:00 til morning. As she gets older we'll hopefully be able to get in a routine that works better for this, but it's not an option right now. I can't just leave her upstairs crying and fussing with a daddy that needs to get to work. I can't bring her with me because our basement is freezing and she'd probably freak out. That leaves either exercising when the girls are up, which is hard and I hate doing it, or waiting until naptime, which is when I typically need a break as well. Some days I feel like I could be up to it, and other days I need to catch up on sleep. It's just a weird place right now.

But I still have about four weeks left before I am cleared to workout. So there is time to figure it out. 

As far as eating, I have started working on this already. About two weeks ago, I started eating according to my macros. This means that I am eating foods to fit within a set limit for carbs, fats, and mostly proteins. It is a huge adjustment to eat a lot more protein. But amazingly I have already seen results so I will stick with it. I am able to eat a lot more food than the average diet as long as I'm choosing wisely with the foods I eat. Protein protein protein! It helps so much. 

Again, mentally I'm doing pretty good. Three kids three and under is a lot to juggle but I haven't felt too overwhelmed (other than naptime, seriously I just hate starting naptime every day! Necessary, but no fun.) I've been able to keep up on laundry, general tidiness, and getting us out of the house. That's all I wanted to accomplish at this point. I will start cooking supper for us again now that our friends have all brought us food and that is done. (So so wonderful; it made the transition from two to three so much easier.) Let's hope that doesn't overwhelm me! Amelia likes to be worn in a sling, and I'm banking on that to help with the chaos/late afternoon crying that sometimes happens. 

Amelia Jane - One month old

It's hard to believe a whole month has gone by since Amelia was born. But then again, a lot has changed and been squeezed in since then. The first two weeks were a little rough. As I mentioned earlier, our biggest adjustment was with our oldest daughter. She really needed our consistency and nonverbal reassurance that we were still a family, mom and dad were still the same, her role in our family was still the same, etc. She tested us in as many ways as she could think of, and we pushed back with the same response and reaction as always. (consistency is so very important). Thankfully, after the first two weeks, we got into a decent routine and now it seems like that was so long ago. It's crazy how four weeks can feel so short and yet also feel so long. (For the record, the routine is with the older girls. Amelia is still all over the place with sleeping and eating.)

The first weekend was interesting. While we (baby and me) waited for my milk to come in, she basically stayed attached to me the whole time. She nursed and nursed and nursed, and when she wasn't nursing, she was sleeping. I couldn't put her down hardly at all and nobody else could hold her. Thankfully, once my milk came in, she completely transformed into a happy, full, content little baby. Suddenly, she was happy to be held by anyone and didn't mind sleeping in the bassinet or boppy pillow. I had a little bit of freedom! It was (and is) great.

Speaking of sleep, she still prefers to sleep on my chest. Mine is best, but she is happy on Daddy's too, at least most of the time. I don't mind having her sleep on me since I am all too aware of how quickly she will grow up. These days are fleeting and I adore having a sweet baby to cuddle as much as possible. Most of the time, if she is sleeping hard enough, I can put her down in the bassinet, on the boppy pillow, in the swing that we borrowed from a friend, or in the pack n play. I'm thankful she's so versatile. She also sleeps decent in the carseat if she falls asleep while we are moving. Otherwise, she hates the carseat. If I put her in there and then don't immediately pick it up and put her in the car or stroller, she lets me know. Girlfriend has quite the cry. She completely skipped over the newborn cry and can scream like the best of them.

Nursing has been going well. She latched on great right away, then got a little lazy and didn't latch on as aggressively. I got a few cracks and blisters which added to the initial pain of the first two weeks. I also had what my midwife called a strained milk duct, which felt like a pulled muscle every time she would nurse on the right side (so much better than mastitis, which I had with Audrey in the beginning). It has mostly gone away now, but that side still hurts a little bit when she first latches on. Thankfully, the pain is only for less than 10 seconds and then it's completely fine and pain free until the next time. She does nurse on both sides most of the time, and falls asleep in between sides which means I'm usually putting her down for ten minutes or so and then coming back to finish up when she realizes she's not full. That's really fun in the middle of the night. (Note the sarcasm.) No matter what I do to keep her awake or wake her up, she refused to be roused. When I was a first time mom, that would have really stressed me out, but now I'm aware how quickly time goes, and I don't mind so much being up a little more in the middle of the night. It could be worse.

She's waking up around 2:00 every morning and then is often up again at 4:30 or 5:00. Just the other day, she slept through that 2:00 feeding and woke up starving at 6:00. It was pretty amazing! I'd take every day in a heartbeat, but I have no hopes that it will happen again. At least not yet. She is such a louder sleeper with all of the grunting, though. I have a feeling that she will be in the nursery sooner than Audrey was (around five months old I believe) because I don't sleep very well when she's constantly wiggling and grunting while she sleeps.

Her sisters adore her. In particular, Josie gives her kisses all the time and is constantly at my side when I change her or get her dressed. I try to keep her involved by having her help with little things. She's usually happy to grab a burp cloth, throw away any garbage, grab a blanket, pull the vibrating toy attached to her carseat, sing to her if she's crying, and a bunch of other things. She knows to be gentle and doesn't try to pick her up or hold her. My biggest concern is that she will cover her up, thinking she's cold. We've had to talk a lot about why we can't put pillows on her head or blankets over her face. She's always being so gentle and loving but I don't trust her alone with Amelia. I mean, she's three. She gets a lot, but not everything. I haven't seen any signs of her being annoyed with Amelia. She will let me know when she's crying (as if I can't hear it) and has asked a couple of times to have me put her down so I could help her, but generally she loves her and wants her to be around. She also says "She's so cute!" and "I love Amelia/my baby sister!" at least once a day.

Audrey is happy to coexist with Amelia. She gets concerned if Amelia loses a sock or shoe, and will rush it over to me to put it back on. She will also give her kisses if prompted and once in a while on her own. She also hasn't shown any signs of annoyance or displeasure from having a baby sister. I thought she would be clingy or resentful that I couldn't always pick her up, but she has been totally fine with it. Besides, Daddy's the one she wants to pick her up, and he usually is in charge of the big girls when we are all together. It's been working well.

I think the hardest part so far has been not having a regular routine. She's way too young for that, so we are all kind of stuck working around when she's hungry or eating. I try to feed her before we go places or before we are doing something in particular, but it seems like she always gets hungry (starving!) right at the worst time. Example? Supper time. She can sleep and sleep all afternoon, but the second we sit down to eat, she has to eat too. How do babies know that everyone else is eating?? She will wake up from a deep slumber just angry right when I sit down at the table. So I've been scarfing down supper pretty quickly lately, which does help with portion control I guess. Other than that, it's been a relatively smooth transition.

Except nap time, but that's more the older girls than anything. Amelia is usually asleep during that crazy hour or so (getting them to sleep has become quite tedious and can take at least that long before I'm sure they are both asleep) or she's stuck hanging out with me while I sit with them uncomfortably in their rooms. Once in a while, she'll hang out in the swing with the music blaring.

Music! I may have mentioned this before, but she loves music. It has been a huge help for me when I am trying to get ready in the morning. If I put the music on and get the mobile spinning, I usually have enough time to take a quick shower and maybe even get fully dressed before she starts fussing. She really responds well to it. She also seems to enjoy being sung to much more than the other girls did. I so love how attentive she is to it.

She seems to focus in on us a lot more than the other two, too. When she has her wide awake time, she will really lock in on our faces and not look away for anything. I can't wait to see her smile in the next couple of weeks or so. I swear I can tell when she wants to, but she just hasn't connected that yet.

And a few comparison shots of all three girls. At this point, I think they all look so different. Amelia is the most "attentive" in that she was legitimately looking at the camera for most of the shots. She has way less hair but much clearer skin. I couldn't get it quite to scale, so she looks a little smaller here, but I assure you she is definitely bigger than Audrey was and about the same size as Josie was.

Man I love these girls!

She has her moments when we can't figure out what is wrong and the only thing that works is nursing or wrapping her tight and SHHHHing in her ear as loud as we can. Generally, though, if you change her diaper, wrap her up nice and warm, feed her, and hold her a little bit, she'll calm down and be happy. I'm so thankful for that. She won't take a pacifier, something I don't really want to accept, but we're working on that. (Yes, I was totally dependent on it with both Josie and Audrey. It's just nice to have something to soothe them that isn't a part of my body.) Amelia will suck on my pinky finger for hours if I let her, but the second a pacifier is in her mouth, she is gagging and acting like I tried to choke her. While it's humorous how she reacts, it's frustrating that she won't take it! I still want to try a few other kinds of pacifiers, but I wouldn't be surprised if she just doesn't end up being a pacifier baby. There are worse things.

All in all, she's been a sweet, content little baby girl.

What those kiddos are saying

Playing with the nativity set
Josie: Joseph, now you put the baby down. The baby needs to be. 

While eating a noodle dish for the third time leftover style
Josie: Mom... these noodles make me shiver!

Audrey at supper time
Me: Audrey, can you eat your green beans?
Audrey: No, it's ice cream! Mmmmm, ice cream
She proceeded to eat all of them, never swaying from her story that it was ice cream. The game even worked with Josie, who loved pretending that they were dessert. 

Audrey while we are praying before meals: 

Audrey: Thank you Lord for this food and for Grandma's house.

Long pause. 

All of us: Amen...
Apparently that's all we are thankful for every single time she prays.

While not as humorous, it's noteworthy to point out that the last time we went to the library, Josie really had a better understanding of the future, and not just the present time. Most visits, I spend my time picking out the books to bring home while the girls spend their time taking books off the shelves to read individually or have me read to them. No matter how many times I'd ask them if they wanted to bring them home instead, they always wanted to read them now.  This time, Josie got excited at the idea of having it to read over and over again at home, and suddenly it was like a door had opened. She couldn't pick out books fast enough to put in the library bag. When we got home, she excitedly ran to get the books she had picked out and was waiting on the couch to read them before nap time. It was fun to see her connect those dots! The concept of time is really coming together for her lately.

Amelia's birth story

It's no secret that my due date was a mystery, at least to the doctors. Because they pushed it back, I was "allowed" to go overdue a lot longer than I would have if they had left it at January 23rd. When I went into my 41 week appointment, I was really at almost 43 weeks (!!). The midwife noticed that my blood pressure was elevated and that it wasn't going down no matter how long I sat there, so she set me up to come in later that night to induce me. I was pretty bummed out about having to be induced, but I also had confidence in the midwife's reasoning and agreed that it was a good idea.

So, I went home from that appointment, packed my bags, packed the girls' bags, and cleaned up the house. We dropped the girls off at their grandparents' house and leisurely made our way to the hospital.

They used a gel to prep my cervix that night, hoping to make it more susceptible for the Pitocin that they started in the morning. Whether it was this gel or my body naturally starting things, I did have regular contractions all night long that were 2-3 minutes apart and lasting about a minute each. They didn't really help me progress, so Pitocin was started at 6:00 AM.

They started it out slow with the contractions being pretty manageable. I was determined to avoid an epidural for fear of them hitting nerves again like what had had happened with my previous two kiddos. I managed the pain with various laboring positions (walking around, using the exercise ball, taking a bath which was amaaaaazing) and felt pretty good about how it was going.

They kept turning up the Pitocin, and the laboring kept getting more intense. Around 6:30 PM, twelve hours into active labor, I felt like I must be getting close, since the contractions were crazy strong and I was feeling like I must be near transition. Imagine my dismay when I found out I was only at a 4.5-5. Halfway! I broke down, then, realizing that at this rate, I could be laboring for another 12+ hours.

I admit, I was a hot mess. The fear of that nerve pain mixed with the strong contractions coupling and tripling up on each other (a sign of a big baby, they told me) was putting me in an all out panic. Thankfully, the anesthesiologists seemed to really understand and talked me through it as best they could. They didn't directly hit a nerve, but they definitely got close enough for me to scream out in anticipation. Nothing brings me down like that nerve pain, I tell you.

Once the epidural kicked in, I drifted off to sleep for about an hour. I was so sleep deprived that I didn't even move or wake up with the nurses coming and going. Our nurse needed to put in a catheter because of the epidural. She also wanted to put in a device that would help them monitor the contractions' strength. As she went to do this, she felt the baby's head instead!

Amazingly, after only having the epidural for an hour and a half, I had progressed the remaining 5 cm and was ready to push. The midwife came in and got all set up, and I got to work. After about five minutes, she noticed that the baby was posterior, meaning she was face up instead of face down. This meant that pushing could take a lot longer. I was running on an adrenaline high from the surprising news of being ready to push already, so I pushed with everything I had.

Five minutes later, after only pushing for ten minutes, she was here! They got her up on my chest and we just stared at each other for what felt like forever. She didn't have as much hair as the other two, but there was a small amount of dark brown hair that just made me love her even more. Oh these babies, they do know how to win you over right away.

Unfortunately, I ended up hemorrhaging a lot of blood after she was delivered. They had to give me multiple types of medicine to slow down the blood flow/loss, which resulted in not-so-fun symptoms (stomach cramps, nausea, diarrhea, tight muscles). The most obnoxious was the muscle fatigue that really slowed down recovery process. Even almost a week later, I still feel like I can only move at half the speed I normally would. My muscles feel like they are being restrained when I walk around or try to do any kind of bigger movement. The blood loss has also left me feeling even more tired than normal.

All of that doesn't even matter when I think of this sweet baby girl. She weighed 9 lbs 12 oz and was 22 inches long at birth. With her large birth size, being posterior, and being induced, I am so thankful for how smoothly it went. It could have been so much worse! I am pretty confident that my original due date was accurate, considering how developed she was. She came out looking like a 3 week old. Even her demeanor is a lot like an older baby. Lucky me, I guess, because I still get the newborn cuddles, but the baby herself is not quite as fragile. :)

As far as being induced and getting an epidural, two things I wanted to avoid at all costs, I have changed my tune. With all three of my pregnancies, getting the epidural after laboring for quite a long time has allowed my body to progress faster to being fully dilated and we have not had many complications (besides the initial nerve pain). My recovery doesn't seem to be too negatively affected by it either. Of course, getting induced still makes the labor ridiculous, something I can confidently say since I didn't have hardly an Pitocin with Audrey's labor process and had much more manageable contractions. Regardless, I'm thankful that there is the option to get labor going in a more natural way than jumping to a cesarean section. It's not perfect, but I can't imagine how things would have gone without modern medicine.

Amelia Jane is very healthy. She latched on great right away and eats like a champ, something I definitely do not take for granted! Her eyes are a very dark blue/gray, that will almost definitely change as she gets older. Her hair is thicker in the back, but does cover her whole head with a dark brown color. Her skin is dry and very peely since she was overdue, and she is also a nice shade of pink. These Deyle girls are always quite pink right away. Her eyes were a little swollen from being posterior, so she's changed a lot even from these initial pictures. It seems that none of us can quite get enough of her. We're so glad she's here.