Bennett Owen's birth story

While I doubt he'll want to know the details of his birth when he's older, I still feel compelled to write out his birth story like I did for his sisters. I suppose I should start about two weeks before his due date. 

On Wednesday, I went in with the girls along for the ride (almost always, it's just what we do). So far, nothing had been alarming and the appointments were fairly quick. This time, though, my blood pressure was elevated and it wouldn't come down. I also had protein in my urine test which meant I had to do a more intense version, the 24 hour test, at home to make sure there wasn't anything wrong. I spent the next day collecting everything that would normally go into the toilet in a large jug. It was not fun. 

On Friday, two days since my last appointment, I brought my urine jug to the hospital clinic (farther away, much busier, and generally more expensive after going through insurance). I expected to be in and out, but my blood pressure was even higher (around 160/70) and wasn't coming down. My midwife was fairly alarmed by all of this so she admitted me to the OB floor on the hospital side. I had Audrey (4 years old) and Amelia (just barely 2 years old) with me and they were pretty wide eyed the whole time. I'm sure seeing mom suddenly in a hospital gown laying in bed is pretty crazy from their perspective. Thankfully, my parents were coming to town to bring back Josie, so they were able to swing by and pick them up while I waited. Trying to keep them entertained and calm while laying in a bed was not ideal. I had not brought in an extra diaper for Amelia (it was in the car but I couldn't go get it) and only had two books with and no food. 

After they left, I learned that I no longer had protein in my urine and that my resting blood pressure was better than when I had first come in. I was told I could go home as long as I rested as much as possible over the weekend. For sure, baby boy would be induced the following Wednesday (at 39 weeks) if not sooner based on the numbers they'd been seeing. I asked what all of these tests were indicating, and my midwife explained that protein in the urine means that something is stressing my body out. A higher blood pressure could lead to calcium deposits on my placenta. If there were enough of them, it could limit the blood supply going to baby. Spoiler: I asked if there were any visible deposits on my placenta after he was born and there weren't. No wonder he wasn't showing signs of stress even with these higher numbers. 

On Monday, I left the girls with a friend and headed back to the hospital/clinic. I was expecting to see the high BP numbers and be told that I'd be staying to have the baby, but instead I was pleasantly surprised to see a completely normal number. My midwife was happy to see that and said that I could go home and rest until Wednesday morning. This was such an answer to prayer because I had rescheduled my piano recital from Wednesday afternoon to Tuesday afternoon, just barely avoiding canceling it. I really wanted to have it since the kids had worked hard all year and I knew I wouldn't see them again until the Fall.

Wednesday was pretty uneventful. As always, with extra fluid in my body (usually the case when I'm at this point in pregnancy), finding a good vein for the IV was challenging and the fancy nurse with a good reputation for getting IVs set up was able to it going in the worst place (my left arm, I'm left handed, right by the elbow which meant that every time I bent my arm it would set off alarms). My nurse, Amanda, was wonderful and so patient. She kept raising my pitocin levels until they were maxed out but all I felt was some discomfort. My body was basically rejecting the push to go into labor.

The midwife on call came in and said that we could either break my water now and push things along  more forcefully or call it quits until Thursday morning, give my body a chance to rest, and do another step that would soften my cervix a bit more. She ended up going with option two, so I settled in for a boring night sleeping in that uncomfortable hospital bed, most definitely not in labor.

On Thursday, after a somewhat decent night of sleep and some stronger contractions from the meds to get my cervix softer, I was pleased to hear I was a little farther along. Now remember, I  had never progressed quickly until I got an epidural and then I'd go from a 3 or 4 to a 10 in just an hour or two. I was happy going from a 1.5 to a 2.5 overnight. Once the pitocin started, the contractions got intense quickly. My nurse (same one, which was awesome!) showed no mercy on me and said at one point that she wanted to see the pain level in my face. Ha! The midwife chose to break my water just an hour later and she gave me the okay to get an epidural anytime after that. At 11;15, I was more than ready. I had no illusions that it was worth trying to have a natural birth since my body was not picking up the labor on it's own.

With Josie and Audrey, a nerve was hit when the epidural was being put in and it was ridiculously painful. With Amelia, I was so tired and overwhelmed after being in labor for fourteen hours that I sobbed through most of it, fearing and anticipating that horrible pain. This time, I prepped the anesthesiologist with these details. This guy was a character. He was from an Eastern European country and had a strong accent to show it. He meant serious business and came across direct and intimidating. My nurse had warned me that he was just like that, and I actually liked it. He was direct and to the point. This time, like with Josie, Mike got queasy and had to sit down, It ended up being a good distraction for me as I waited for it to be over.

The epidural was a little stronger on one side, but other than that it worked great. He warned me that it takes away pain but not pressure, and again, I preferred that. I wanted to be able to feel progression and know when to push. My nurse checked me often because of my history, but I wasn't progressing very quickly at all. After two hours, it was clear that this was going to go differently than the girls' labors so she told me to call her if I felt like pushing and gave us some time to rest.

I noticed that I felt that urge to push soon after that. It wasn't very strong but it was definitely there. When she checked me, I was only at 6 cm. Why was I feeling that urge to push? She decided to check me through a contraction and realized that he was sliding down really low but then going back up after it was done. Knowing this, I really doubted if I would know when it was time to truly push. Thankfully, after another hour and a half, I was at 9 cm. She said that basically I was there except for the last part of the lip of the cervix. She went to call the midwife since she could manually help with that part, but within seconds of her shutting the door it was very clear that everything was ready to go.

I have never felt an urge to push like that. I imagine that the epidural was not doing much because it was excruciating. The nurse came running in, begging me to wait for the midwife. She was on her way but it seemed to take an hour. I am sure it was less than five minutes, but I was losing it. She came in, got the gloves on, exclaimed about his thick head of hair (yes, he was already crowning, there was no slowing him down) and basically caught him on the next contraction. I remember her telling me to slow down, and I remember screaming that that was impossible. I guess she was turning him a little bit so his shoulders would come out smoother and cause less tearing, but it was intensely painful, the worst ring of fire of all four kids.

Once he was out, he was on my chest immediately and he stayed there while everything else continued on. I did bleed more than normal but thankfully it was nothing compared to Amelia's postpartum hemorrhage. I had so much more energy because labor had only been 8 1/2 hours with only 3 of them without an epidural.

Bennett was born at 4:30 PM weighing 8 lbs 9 oz. He was 20 1/2 inches long with beautiful pink coloring and a solid cry. The girls were very eager to come and meet him so my parents brought them over past their bedtime. It was completely worth it. They came all dressed in pretty dresses with cards for us parents and a present for him. Mike's mom was able to come too (the rest of his family had colds so they didn't come to the hospital). It was perfect.

The next morning, I got the good news that we could be discharged after his 24 hour tests. He didn't have any problems so we left the hospital at around 5:30 with a baby just barely 25 hours old. I still felt great, tired, but not as physically fatigued. I had been able to walk around and bathe the night he was born and the rest of the recovery was much less intense since I hadn't lost as much blood. It was refreshing and a huge relief since we were coming home to a house full with four kids. Four kids! It'll take a while to get used to that.

His official hospital photo, tongue out and all

Checking in

Are you ready to hear the saddest thing? I had Bennett's entire birth story (yes, he's born! He's here!) written up and it didn't save after the first paragraph. Finding the motivation and time to do it again hasn't been a priority, but I will do it soon. I'm determined to get it written down before I forget most of the details. In the meantime, here are a few pictures of our lovely little man, taken in the first few weeks. 

Baby #4

28 weeks! This pregnancy has felt like it's going in spurts. First, being so sick, it felt very slow and tedious. That passed and suddenly it seemed to jump ahead six weeks. Now, I'm in the third trimester and it seems as though I got here in a blink of an eye while also feeling like I've been pregnant (and will be) forever. 

Funny how it works like that, isn't it?

The baby is the size of a large eggplant. I jump between feeling huge and feeling like I am doing pretty good for this far along. See for yourself.

I've avoided getting injured in my lower back during the second trimester (which happened with all three pregnancies prior) and I also gained less weight by about five pounds. That surprised me because I'm generally not eating great. I just can't avoid those sweets/larger quantities when I'm in the second trimester. But low and behold, I've reached the third trimester and suddenly I can only eat about half the amount before I feel sick to my stomach. I usually only gain around five more pounds from this point on, assuming I go overdue. I'll take that! Less to lose later. (I should point out that while I have not been injured, I am definitely feeling the sciatic nerve pain that seems to be inevitable from this point on as well as braxton hicks already.)

Speaking of going into labor later, I'm fully expecting that I will this time too. At my appointment this week, I did measure bigger by about half a week, so hubby is wondering if that means I'll go into labor sooner as well. I don't know about that, but it is possible I guess. Audrey and Amelia always measured about a week behind, and Amelia ended up being my biggest baby (and the latest to come past her due date). Either this boy is generally bigger, or he's not as tucked in as the girls were in my torso. I'm guessing it's the latter. 

He's active, but not as much as I had initially thought he'd be when I first started feeling him move. There's a lot of movement from 7 PM to 8 AM and then I don't notice it much, mostly because I am moving around enough to likely keep him sleeping. There are times I notice it throughout the day, but it's nothing like the evenings, middle of the night, and when I wake up. 

The girls have all had the chance to feel him move, although I doubt they actually understood what they were feeling. Josie jumps at every chance, but she doesn't have the patience to wait for him to kick again and usually ends up saying a few things to him before moving on to whatever activity she abandoned, missing out on actually feeling anything.

I've had a few friends share what their life was like when their last baby was born and it seems like so many had kind of intense newborns/life adjustments. I feel like we went through that with Amelia, and I can't even imagine a kid more challenging than she was unless there is a disability to work around and learn about. It's totally possible, but I just doubt it will happen. First of all, I got through Amelia's challenging first year because I was way more laid back than I had been with the other two. Each kid has me more laid back than the last, so odds are good with this kiddo, right? I don't expect it to be a breeze, but I do feel confident that we will get through it and I'm hoping and praying I can enjoy the newborn and baby stages of this little guy and not just wish him to grow up.

I'm slowly running out of clothes to wear since most of my older maternity clothes are in rough shape and of course my regular clothes don't fit over the bump. I'm fine with rotating between four or five outfits though, because most days I'm just at home and who cares? 

It's way more fun to think about the baby's clothes. I have a few struggles when it comes to buying clothes for him:

1. First of all, Audrey, and even Amelia who was so big at birth, needed newborn clothes for a few weeks. If baby boy is similar, he'll need newborn clothes until around the beginning of June. I have maybe three pieces of newborn clothing, but I'm not as worried about that because if we need some I'm sure those around us will borrow some to us for those few weeks. 

2. What concerns me is that May/June is really not hot yet and then July/August is super hot. Those months will all work for 0-3 months. I feel like I have two separate wardrobes going on for the beginning. I really don't want to have more than we need, and then there is always the chance that he's huge and jumps to 3-6 months early. 

3. I have hand me downs for that size for now, but I just can't buy hardly anything for that first year until I have an idea what size he'll be and how he'll grow. My babies generally don't end up being bigger than average size, but who knows with this one? I am a planner and like to be on the ball with this stuff, but I'm stuck waiting until after he's here to do much of anything. It's driving me crazy.

4. Even if I was going to buy a bunch now, it's the wrong season. I really need to just wait a few more months and then start looking at what my options are. (I have no idea. How have I not noticed what boys wear in the summer before? Winter is no problem, but summer... I am drawing a blank.)

Anyways, these are minor problems to have and just gives me something to think about when I picture our summer. I still hope that we will be able to be outside a lot, go hiking, swimming, etc, just with a baby in tow this time. We had the best summer last year and I really believe that babies adapt and learn to love what they are introduced to early on. Amelia absolutely loved being outside that first year, and it ended up being my saving grace when she was so fussy and unpredictable. Now, she still adores being outside and does a great job sticking close by and exploring with her sisters.

Baby boy will just have to figure out our family culture, hopefully sooner than later!

Old fashioned ramblings

I miss the days of old when bloggers would write whatever was on their minds or going on that day. It felt like catching up over a cup of coffee whenever I got to sit down and read it. Nowadays, blogs have to have so much purpose, often trying to sell a product or tutorial. Those are great, but I do miss the way it used to be. 

On that note, how about some ramblings from this old blogger?

1. We have been postponing and avoiding the inevitable vehicle upgrade. When we got the Expedition after Audrey was born, it felt enormous. We couldn't imagine outgrowing it. Honestly, we haven't outgrown the vehicle size, but we are outgrowing the seat count. One of the things that made this vehicle affordable to us back then was that there were no third row seats. We didn't need them and we loved all the space in the back. It was quite convenient to leave the double stroller, beach toys, beach chairs, towels, a box going to the thrift store, and books in the back all of the time. Every time hubby thinks about buying something new, he laments over how we'll fit all of that and finally I just admitted to him that it's completely unrealistic to think that'll be possible. Nobody else does that! We just got used to it. 

Well, this week the Expedition decided not to start when the temps were well below zero. We've had no problems with this vehicle (seriously, we've never had to replace anything at all) so whatever it is, I'm not too concerned. Hubby has an idea what it is, has bought the part, and plans to give the vehicle a good cleaning once it's good to go and running again. And then we sell it. Just like that! Now I'm driving the (nicer, newer) truck while hubby drives the (older, very simple) work truck. He was a little upset that he couldn't get it running before he had to leave town for work, but we put things into perspective quickly when we realized that we are so blessed to have three vehicles so that we can do this shuffle, sell the vehicle, and take our time looking for a new one instead of buying the first thing we find. Also, a huge thing that we are so used to and take for granted, we'll be able to buy a new-to-us vehicle with cash, no loan needed. How can we grumble when we have the means to do that? So we start the week with good attitudes, knowing that God will provide what we need before we have four kids to seat instead of three. 

Well that one was long.

2. I keep asking Amelia where her baby brother is, just trying to get used to that word brother. She's been great at saying hi to the baby, giving my tummy hugs and kisses, and even initiating this little bit on her own without being asked. Mommy is the one that needs the help now. I've also been doing some online window shopping. I have a vague idea of what I want, but in all honesty the budget matters more than the style, so it's just for fun right now. I've never dressed a boy! It's so fun to look through all the options (there's more than you fellow boy moms let on) and see what I like and don't like. Already I've gotten some resistance from my hubby. He is not so much into anything hipster-like and apparently I am when it comes to baby boys. Who knew? 

I'm hoping to keep things veeeeery simple with this little guy. Think minimalist wardrobe. Naturals, earth tones, mix and match clothing, etc. With the girls, I always knew there'd be another girl to follow to wear what didn't get worn by older sisters. With this guy, I want to make sure we wear everything we have. I hate the idea of being wasteful. Or having way too much. It'll be a balancing act.

3. I'm itching to go through the clothes Amelia has outgrown. Those bins are absolutely overflowing and there are really only a handful of neutral clothes in there that I can set aside for this baby. I walk into the nursery and see those bins and just dream about how roomy that closet will be. When I see the overflowing dresser (also full of outgrown clothes) I dream about seeing it neatly divided into clothes for the toddler and clothes for the baby. I'm adulting hard over here. Who dreams about clean rooms?

The big girls' room is actually not overtaken with clothes. I know, that's shocking. Because Audrey can wear the next size below Josie, I don't have to pack it up and store it in between. The only thing that I store for them is summer clothes (one bin total) and shoes (another bin). Everything else is what Audrey has outgrown, waiting for Amelia, so it's in Amelia's room. That's also only two more bins. It's so nice to open their closets and see a reasonable amount of clothing that they can actually wear right now. 

4. Hubby busted me the other day on my lack of cooking this season. I was explaining to him how little I have to do throughout the week because of weekend leftovers, small group, etc, and he reminded me that he has been doing most of the weekend cooking. I can't help it that I'm always completely uninspired when pregnant. He comes up with all these great ideas while I sit there nodding, saying, "oh yes, that sounds good!" and then he says, "I'll just make it" since he has the idea in his head anyways. I want to enjoy cooking again, but I'm also realistic. Its most likely not going to happen until about six months after baby is born. Insert sad, frustrated face here.

5. I'm surprising myself with how little disappointment I've had with winter this year. I missed most of fall weather because of being sick all the time, so when winter came, I think I was just relieved to be able to hunker down at home without being sick. The older two girls are big enough to play outside without me so I'm able to lovingly shove them outside when they are driving me crazy. I know we have a solid three months more of winter, but I actually don't mind the cold and snow as long as the temps stay above or around 10 degrees or so. Of course, that won't happen consistently for a while now but it's a season, and right now I'm okay with being stuck inside most of the time.

Josie's been staying up a little later than her sisters these days and I've been teaching her how to play Crazy Eights to pass the time. Hubby saw this and immediately sat down to teach her Gin Rummy. It's harder so she wasn't quite as into it, but it was a blast and a peak into our future with more kids able to play our favorite games.